


cause im a fucking mess sometimes

by cherry_throat



Category: K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Feels, M/M, Oops, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Smut, Sope, Yoonseok - Freeform, song relation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-23
Updated: 2017-08-23
Packaged: 2018-12-18 13:20:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11875356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cherry_throat/pseuds/cherry_throat
Summary: Yoongi's head hangs to the side and his eyes lay on the bedside table. A picture frame comes into vision.(More often then not, the most beautiful things are the farthest way.)One-shot with angst. Based off of a song.





	cause im a fucking mess sometimes

**Author's Note:**

> So, I shuffled my music and started writing.

and it goes like this:  
  


1\. Every "morning" (more like 1 PM) he strips the thin blankets from his body.

2\. He makes himself a cup of tea (never coffee, coffee is for satan and adults).

3\. He pulls on a t-shirt.

4\. He sits at the small fountain while he waits for bus 724148 to take him to the local radio broadcaster on SeogYo-Dong.

5\. He hosts the 7 PM to 2 AM time slot for an unpopular (Namjoon likes to call it "underground") radio station.

6\. He stops at the nearest convenience store and picks up the disgusting cinnamon gum in which he hates but it always ends up on his tongue by the end of the night.

7\. Left. Right. Right. 

8\. He then turns at the fire hydrant where he hikes up the steps to a certain apartment 43.

8\. He will then let himself into the home of one Jung Hoseok who always leaves his front door unlocked.

9\. What happens after that depends on if Hoseok is asleep or not.

If Hoseok is asleep, Yoongi will set up camp on his sofa. He knows where the extra blankets are. He knows where to leave the cinnamon gum for Hoseok to see. He knows when he wakes up Hoseok will likely be gone but he doesn't mind because Hoseok keeps a slue of Yoongi's favorite tea.

If Hoseok is awake, he might be at the sofa in which Yoongi will slump down next to him. His eyes will focus on the tv screen but his mind is far from whatever Hoseok is watching.   
The bravest will find their hand on the other's thigh; innocent and wordless and just enough invitation.   
Soon, Yoongi and Hoseok meet each other; slow and hesitating turns into desperate and touchy, and Yoongi can feel Hoseok's eyes on him but its no secret that Yoongi looks everywhere but at Hoseok.

It's just mutuallycasual. of course.

_Definitely, totally, utterly, undeniably, truthfully, positively_ **_casual._ **

Or at least that's what Yoongi tells himself.   
Even when he knows that his heart does flip-flops when he's seen the '43' that hangs on Hoseok's door.   
That every night, Hoseok will beg him to sleep in his bed but every night Yoongi will opt for the couch.   
That the boy with the sun in his eyes makes him want to put on a different t-shirt every day.   
That every day he waits for his bus, Yoongi will fish a coin out of his pocket and find himself thinking about only Hoseok. And he'll think about throwing the coin into the fountain and wishing.

But he'll promptly shove the coin back into his pocket, because that's money, and he can't afford it on childish things.

One night, same as usual; the sky is dark with the absence of the moon.

Yoongi finds himself on Hoseok's couch, and then on Hoseok's lap, (and then on Hoseok's bad-side after Yoongi nips particularly hard at his collar) and Yoongi can see the domination growing in his chest.  
He's puffing heavily into the side of Hoseok's neck as he slides back onto three of his own fingers. Hoseok hands envelop his hip bones as Yoongi works himself open. Hoseok sitting on the couch, under Yoongi, watches Yoongi's concentrated face. Hoseok glares up at Yoongi, fingers digging into his soft waist as he attempts to control himself.  
Lucky for him, Yoongi is happy with the stretch.

Hoseok thumbs a finger over his hole, light, and teasing and Yoongi responds expectedly: loud and keening.

It doesn't take long before Hoseok is pushing Yoongi off of him and standing up tall. Yoongi is quick to reach out, grabbing one of Hoseok's arms to steady himself. Hoseok guides his hands to knit around the tall boy's neck and Yoongi props on his toes. Hoseok puts one hand soft on Yoongi's hip and the other is gripping Yoongi's ass cheek.

"Tell me what you need." Hoseok appeals low and in a half-whisper.

Yoongi groans when Hoseok slips a finger over his hole again.

"Shit, fuck me."

After Hoseok slides on a condom, Yoongi finds himself lying completely still under Hoseok, not risking any movement as the younger lightly presses Yoongi's hips down into the mattress with the palms of his hands.

Hoseok grips his waist particularly hard and leans down close to Yoongi's face.

"Mine," Hoseok asserts, the growl sending shock waves under Yoongi's skin.

Yoongi's voice is lost as Hoseok sets his lubed cock in front of Yoongi's hole.   
Hoseok's thrusts into him exceptionally slow.   
It's long, drawn out drags and pulls, like the ocean on indica.   
hiss hands feel white hot on his waist and his thumbs are tracing circles into his hipbones. Hoseok increases his speed with each thrust and soon, he is tugging Yoongi back against his own pelvis as he moves into Yoongi; and every time, Yoongi lets out a happy puff of air.

Yoongi reaches up, needy and grabby and desperate; and thankfully, Hoseok knows exactly what he wants.  
He leans down to seal their lips together. There's something deliberate and excitingly passionate at the lazy way they move together. Yoongi's tongue curls into Hoseok's mouth earning him a low growl that resonates in Yoongi's stomach and dances up his spine.

Yoongi wants to ride him--a lot. But he's almost at his breaking point from the tingle at the tips of his fingers and the white hot churning in his belly--plus, he's too spent to be dealing with gravity at this moment. 

Yoongi easily gets lost in ebb and flow; sinking under the warm seas of Hoseok's body. And he's totally fine with drowning.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Yoongi can hear Hoseok whispering and he catches soft praises and each one lights a spark in his chest that settles warmly in his chest. But he's too far gone in his own world; letting all of the sensations overwhelm him in every way; chasing his high. The warmth is pooling in his belly, and he can hear himself gasping now everytime Hoseok rocks into him.

Perhaps Yoongi says something to indicate his approach--or maybe it's the way his back arches up from the mattress and his hands grip the sheets and the pillow and anything that he can get a hold of, but Hoseok is gripping his thighs now, tighter and he can't wait to see the purple tomorrow. 

"You gonna come? Were you even going to ask?" Hoseok leans down, huffing.

Suddenly, he pauses, body stilling inside of Yoongi.   
  
And at the break of friction, Yoongi starts to panic.   
And from the panic, he finds himself desperate.   
And from the desperation he finds himself begging.

"Please." Yoongi finds himself whining, "Please, don't stop. I wanna come."

Hoseok cards a hand through his own hair before smiling filthily.

"Good boy. Come for me,"

And before he can react, Hoseok rocks his hips harsh, fast, and heavy into Yoongi, and he feels his body curl into itself when he comes messily and all over himself.

Hoseok's eyes are only on Yoongi and his face is contorted in concentration. Yoongi takes his Hoseok's right hand and guides Hoseok's thumb onto the center of his tongue. Hoseok follows his lead and presses his finger into Yoongi's mouth and Yoongi suckles on it.  
That's when Hoseok empties himself into the condom and Yoongi wishes to feel the hot cum inside of him.

Yoongi keens at the way Hoseok thrusts into him, rocking Yoongi through his high and it's bliss, but he can feel himself becoming oversensitive and he whines at Hoseok through the haze.

The younger finally pulls out, his cock dragging out.

He leans down and places a light kiss on the edge of Yoongi's mouth.   
He's looking at Yoongi in a way that makes him feel  _special_  and it feels so good. 

_And I had too many flash fires_

__That I just let them burn_ _

"Okay?"

Yoongi nods and smiles.

Hoseok goes somewhere to get a warm towel or something like that.

Yoongi's head hangs to the side and his eyes lay on the bedside table. A picture frame comes into vision.   
A Polaroid of a beautiful girl wrapped in a lavender wool scarf. 

_But I'm still caught below_

__And I'll never let you know_ _

She is smiling in a way that her eyes disappear and her cheeks blush. A familiar face accompanies her. Sharp features and angled looks, Hoseok possesses a half-smile and with their hands, they each make a hand heart.

_No, I can't tell you nothing_

Sharp features and angled looks, Hoseok possesses a half-smile, joy spread across his face.

_Whatever you wanted_

__But not what you needed_ _

Yoongi swallows the sudden pain in his chest. A rush of grief glides through his heart.   
With wobbly knees, he swings his legs over the side of the bed. He picks up someone's clothes; it might be Hoseok's shirt--but it doesn't matter--t's too late because he's pulling the fabric over his head and his pants up his legs.

Hoseok is returning, and his expression is probably broken but Yoongi can't afford to look him in the eye. And he feels a gentle hand on his wrist.

"Don't touch me," Yoongi hears himself say gravely.

_Cause I'm a fucking mess sometimes_

__And I'll say what I don't mean_ _

"Please," Hoseok pleads in a small voice.   
But Yoongi's already halfway out the door.

_Just 'cause I wanted_

__Or maybe I need it_ _

Streaks of tears make their way onto his face.

"Leave me alone."

_I swear lying's the only rush I need_

And as Yoongi sits at the park a few blocks down from Hoseok's flat, bristles of light fleck up from the horizon slowly purging the stars from the sky. He can't help but remember the way Hoseok whispered those words:  _mine._

And it hurts to know that Yoongi will never be Hoseok's. And likewise, Hoseok will never belong to Yoongi.

 _'Cause I had nothing for you_  
 

That no matter how much you may fall in love with stars, it's not like you could ever reach them.

_And I'll never let you know_

_No, I can't tell you nothing_

**Author's Note:**

> I barely proofread.


End file.
